9 Chapter 9: Family Connection

Chapter 9:  Family Connection

About the Author

About the Peer Review

Chapter 9:  Family Connection

Authored by Ardene Niemer, Reviewed by Jessica Kirchhofer

Image 9.1 Father with Son by Braden Collum is licensed under CC by 1.0

This chapter aligns with SLO # 1:  Current theories and ongoing research in early care and education and #4:  explain the importance of developing culturally responsive partnerships with families.

It is likely that you have heard the saying “the family is a child’s first teacher”.  This phrase carries with it our professional obligation to honor, value, and include the families with whom we work in early childhood education.  The National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC) states through the Power to the Profession work that “we need to be clear that recognizing families as the experts on their children and supporting them in their role as their children’s ‘first and most important’ teachers does not undermine the professional responsibilities of early childhood educators.  Rather, it underscores the breadth and depth of professional knowledge early childhood educators need to carry out their formal responsibilities to fully support each child’s cognitive, social, and emotional, physical, and language and literacy development” (NAEYC, 2020).

Chapter 9 provides insight into family connections and how responsive and respectful relationships with families impact the child, family, teacher and ECE program.  The content of the chapter is presented using a positive, strengths-based approach to support children as they grow, develop, and learn.  Using a strengths-based approach centers our lens on looking for and identifying a family’s strengths as a starting point for our work in partnership with the family.

Key Points from this chapter:

• Why connecting programs and staff with families is important in an early learning program
• How to engage and involve families in the program and classroom in meaningful ways
• Recognizing and reflecting on the barriers we face to building connections with families
• Identifying and sharing community resources for families

Chapter Glossary:  Terminology found throughout this chapter

Barriers:  A barrier is an obstacle or obstruction.  In education, barriers can be physical, technological, systemic, financial, or related to mental health and attitude.

Community:  A community, in simple terms, is a group of people living in a common geographical area or space.  Community can also be a feeling or set of relationships between people based on common needs.

Connecting/connection: Connecting with or building a connection with families is the ability of the teacher and school to communicate with and provide support to children and their families.  This includes building and enhancing relationships.

Culturally Responsive:  Cultural responsiveness is “the ability to learn from and relate respectfully with people of your own culture as well as those from other cultures.” (National Center for Culturally Responsive Educational Systems, 2021).  It is a research-based approach that makes connections between what children learn in school and their cultures, languages, and life experiences

Equitable:  Finding the “right fit” to offer what individual children and families need for successful relationships vs. equality which is giving each child and family the same thing.

Family: A family is a main element of our society.  A family is made up of people who care about each other.  The family can be varied in structure, membership, and have a variety of different characteristics.  Typically, all members of a family give and receive love and support from each other.  Family, as referred to in Chapter 9, is important to both individuals and communities.

Family Engagement: Family engagement is a process used to develop and sustain positive, goal-focused connections with families.  A child’s adult caregiver (biological parent, foster parent, siblings, grandparents, other family member or guardian) is encouraged to work intentionally with the school to willingly create and implement goals and activities that aid in the child’s healthy development and learning.

Family Involvement: In contrast to family engagement family involvement is more basic and less intentional.  Family involvement is simply when a family accepts an invitation from the school or teacher to join in an activity usually at the school.  There is no commitment, short-term or ongoing, for continuing to be involved in the child’s learning.

Family Sensitive: Taking the child and family culture, language and background into consideration when developing expectations, goals and curriculum is family sensitive.  An example is when a provider, school, or program intentionally solicits and integrates knowledge about the family, family culture, and family background, as they develop and implement the program expectations and curriculum.

Mental Health:  Mental health refers to a person’s state of psychological or emotional health.

Multi-generational:  Multigenerational families are those consisting of more than two generations living under the same roof.

Physical Health: The health and overall functioning of your body.

Power to the Profession (P2P):  from NAEYC is a national collaboration that defines the early childhood education profession whose vision statement reads, “Each and every child, beginning at birth, has the opportunity to benefit from high-quality early childhood education, delivered by an effective, diverse, well-prepared, and well-compensated workforce.”

Professional: In ECE the term professional is defined as someone who has the personal characteristics, knowledge, and skills necessary to provide quality programs that facilitate children’s learning.  An early childhood professional is someone who promotes high standards for themselves, someone who is continuously improving, and someone who can be an advocate and inform the public about child and family issues.

Professionalism:  The term professionalism refers to the skills and abilities expected of a professional and includes behaviors and attitudes shown by someone in the workplace.

Racism:  A belief that race is a fundamental determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race (https://www.merriam-webster.com )

Reciprocal:  Shared, felt, or shown by both sides.  In a reciprocal relationship both individuals are engaged in a mutual give and take manner.

Responsive:  A research-based approach that focuses on making meaningful connections between what a child learns in school and what a child brings to the classroom including their family culture, language, and life experiences.

Strengths-based:  Helpful and encouraging mindsets, that support adults to see children and families in a more optimistic manner which allows for a strong foundation to build relationships and learning.  Using a strengths-based approach begins with focus on a child’s (and family’s) positive attributes and seeing possibilities to build upon.

Unintended consequence:  The result or consequence of a purposeful behavior or action that is not intended, planned, or expected.  Unintended consequences can result in a benefit, a disadvantage, or an opposite effect.

Image 9.2 A Big Hug is licensed under CC by 1.0

Families today

To understand, respect, and be responsive to the families and children we serve, we must first look at what each of us define as family.  We all probably have an image in our minds of what a family is, but often we do not stop and think about how the families in our programs may have different characteristics.  We need to learn about the diversity in the cultures of our families as well as the diversity in family structure.  These perspectives are important considerations for success for the child and family and provide critical information about how to design and deliver program content.  It will also guide how we work with families in creating goals and even choosing learning materials.

The foundation for family connections is developed by first creating a shared definition of family.  We know that all children are part of a family, but “family” does not fit in a single idea or concept of what a family is.  Families are made in many ways:  different sizes, and compositions.  Some examples include single parent families, two-parent families, and extended families with more than one generation living together.  We need to recognize families that are blended, stepfamilies, biracial/multi-racial families, families from the LGBTQ+ community, straight families, families that have immigrated to the U.S., transnational families that live in two countries, and migrant families that move following work availability.  Children may have been born into a family or may become part of a family through foster care, adoption, or kinship arrangements.

We also know that some children in our programs live in more than one home and are members of more than one family.  We also need to be aware that not all the families we serve have a stable residence.  There are many homeless families with young children in our communities.

Reflection

Categorize your own family

• o I grew up in a larger family.
• o I grew up in a smaller family.
• o I grew up in a medium-sized family.

1. What is your concept of small, medium, and large families?
2. Do you think there could be a disparity between your view of family size and that of your classmates?
3. How did you count or include members of your family? Do relatives and non-relatives share the same status?

• How do you think your answers and those of your classmates are influenced by race, ethnicity, and culture?

1. What do you need to take away from this reflection to implement into your practice with children and families?

The Stresses of Family Life

In addition to the stresses of daily life that we all face, including finding work, paying bills, relationships with friends and family, taking care of our heath, etc.; parents with young children face even greater burdens.  Parents with young children are often at the beginning of their career and make less money in addition to having to pay all the costs related to child rearing.  We know from research and parent report that there is a clear lack of affordable, quality childcare and financial subsidies to help with costs, leading to more young families living in poverty.  Families often need greater access to healthcare for themselves, their children, and often their own parents which is lacking in many communities.  Many families may work in positions where family leave is not even available.  Other families struggle with the additional responsibilities if their child happens to have special needs or is struggling academically.  Working with therapists and teachers can often feel like a second job for these families.  Families often report that the result of the lower income, little to no paid-time off work, and higher costs means that most feel like they have no safety net; one injury, illness, car repair or other such expense would be devastating.  Overall, family life is stressful and leaves most families feeling overwhelmed much of the time.  The family stress can often lead to relationship difficulties for the adults of the family which only compounds the stress that the children feel.

Influences on families

Think back for a moment to what you know and have learned about child development philosophers and theorists.  It is appropriate here to recall Urie Bronfenbrenner and the ecological systems theory.  According to Bronfenbrenner, everything in a child’s environment affects how he or she grows and develops.  Within the child’s microsystem of home and school, research shows that the more encouraging and nurturing the relationships between the people in these two places are, the greater the benefit the child will receive from each environment.  In turn, this can positively influence how strong and successful the child will likely grow to be.  Relationships between the adults in the family are significant influence on children and so are the relationships the family has with the people with whom the child spends time.

Racism

Racism is another factor that impacts families, parents, and children.  Families of color often struggle to have equitable access to meaningful work, high-quality childcare, appropriate medical care, etc.  Racism can also have an impact on how a parent interacts with their children.  Dealing with racism during daily experiences can place such an unfair burden on people of color that it leads to greater exhaustion and depression.  This has been found to impact children’s development.  These daily experiences of racism have a cumulative effect and can erode emotional, physical, and even spiritual resources for the parent.  Race-related stress may decrease the likely that the parent engages in self-care which may result in reduced emotional availability for the children.  This is particularly likely for families whose race-related stress is significant and/or involves traumatic experiences.  Some potential reactions to racial stress and trauma to be aware of in your work with children and families include:

• Insecure feelings or feelings of shame and lack of confidence
• Triggers or reminders of traumatic events
• Lack of trust
• Difficulty controlling emotions.

Did you know that having positive cultural identity and involvement in advocacy efforts are protective factors against racism?  A protective factor is the presence of something which can help to reduce the effects of a stressor such as race.  Understanding the ways that racism affects families negatively is part of what we can and should do in partnership with all families to build strong programs.  Understanding the presence of the stressors and protective factors may help us to help our families to deal more effectively with overall stress as well as traumatic events.  This is true for working with families as well as working for the health of the whole community.

For many there is a “frantic nature” to parenting, with the compounding effect of all the stressors, responsibilities, and demands on parental time.  Families can feel overwhelmed and unsupported.  Some families face an extraordinary level of parental guilt over not being able to handle all these stressors with ease or families struggling with concerns about the judgements of others.  This stress can result in parents not taking care of themselves or in parents engaging in unhealthy behaviors as they try to cope with their problems (drinking, recreational drugs, etc.)  The result of all these situational factors and systemic factors is that many families are struggling to get by while caring for their children.

Relationships with Schools and Teachers

All families care about their children and their children’s success in school.  There are, however, often cultural issues at play.  In many cultures around the world teachers are highly respected and considered to be experts in their field.  In some cultures, teachers have a higher status and are believed to always be right in what they say and how they teach.  Remember that for many families it would be seen as disrespectful to question a teacher or get involved in their classroom teaching in any way.  Therefore, we need to remember that for many families, it would be very uncommon for the family to visit their children’s schools or talk with or ask questions of their teachers.  This is a primary reason that immigrant families often find their new role as the teacher’s “partner” confusing.

Many cultures are relationship-oriented, and for them it is important to take time to develop trust before sharing information or discussing concerns or challenges.   Interviews with some refugee parents have suggested that the development of informal relationships with their children’s teachers, prior to hearing anything about difficulties from them, would be extremely helpful.

Families have expectations and fears when they send their children to school which are often influenced by their own educational experiences, cultural expectations, and beliefs.  We need to remember that “parent involvement” has been defined by American-born educators, administrators, and researchers.  In general, this term includes things like volunteering, communicating with the school, participating in school activities, and helping with homework.  In many cultures, and often for refugee and immigrant families, the belief is that “you send the kids to school and they become the school’s responsibility because the faculty and staff know better than the family what children need.”

Family fears may also arise when a parent themself has not had a successful experience in school.  This parent may have struggled academically, socially, been bullied, or found eligible for special education services.  These parents may believe that their child’s experience will mirror their own and be fearful or hesitant about their child attending school.  Parents also fear school violence and may have stress and anxiety about school safety.

Our families face stressors that are significant, and often systemic in our culture.  There are no simple solutions.  However, awareness of the challenges and barriers that families face can help educators to create effective relationships with parents because they understand the realities of daily life for many families.  They also respect that each family has its own culture and that we can, over time, come to understand it is a professional obligation to have respect for all families and realize the rich diversity within those families.

The understanding and respect for families is the foundation on which we will build a partnership.  This partnership, in turn, will support the daily learning and education for each child.  The goal is to individualize the approach for connecting with families, free from ideas of what an “ideal family” should look.

like.  This will support equitable access and service for all families we serve.

Image 9.3:  Child holding clear glass jar by Will Santt from Pexels is CC by 2.0.

Connecting with Families by Building Relationships: Valuing who families are and what they bring You might ask the question “why should I connect with families?  What’s in it for me?”  There are many benefits of positive, healthy connections with families.  These include (but are not limited to) increased parent satisfaction with the early learning school services, increased positive behaviors of the children, improved child health, academic and social skills.  Positive relationships with families will free your time to focus more on teaching children.  Because you have more contact that is positive with parents you will learn more about the child’s needs and their home environment.  You can use this information to enhance strategies to better meet the child’s needs.  Finally, when parents are involved and have a positive relationship with you as the child’s teacher, they will tend to see you in a more positive way, and this improves your own morale, and motivation to be the best teacher for this child.

Families come to us in our programs with abundant knowledge that should be valued.  Luis Moll refers to this as “funds of knowledge” (Moll, 2005.)  The concept of “funds of knowledge” is based on a simple premise: people are competent and have knowledge, and their life experiences have given them that knowledge.

Each family brings something different to the classroom and understanding that families contribute in different ways helps us to be respectful and responsive in our work with families.  Not all families want to attend parent/teacher conferences, and not all families are able to do nightly homework with children.  Having teachers that understand this allows families to contribute in the way that values the knowledge they bring.

Parent knowledge may look like a parent sharing knowledge and insight about their child with the teacher.  It might look like a parent using their skills at home in supporting the child and family.  It might also be a parent who builds strong attitudes in their child about school and learning.  It might be a parent who wants to share how to weave, or paint, or plant a vegetable garden.  We need to respect and value this unique knowledge parents bring in order to holistically know and understand the child and build a reciprocal partnership with the family.

Children bring with them the funds of knowledge from their homes and communities that can be used for concept and skill development.  There are 10 categories of funds of knowledge (Gonzalez, 2005) that teachers should consider in developing classroom practices.  With this information, teachers would be less likely to underestimate or constrain what children are learning.  Using the funds of knowledge, teachers can focus on supporting students to find meaning connected to their home lives and background which can be represented in the activities and materials provided in the classroom.

The 10 Categories of Funds of Knowledge include (Gonzalez, 2005):

1. Home Language
2. Family Values and Traditions
3. Caregiving
4. Friends and Family
5. Family Outings
6. Household Chores
7. Educational Activities
8. Favorite TV Shows
9. Family Occupations
10. Scientific Knowledge

We know from reading this section that teachers have strengths and expectations, and families have strengths and expectations.  What if they do not match?  It is essential that we work to build bridges to work together so that children are safe and healthy and can learn optimally.  Working together with the family it is our goal to create a safe, rich, and supportive environment for learning.

Strengths-based relationships

Think about the following three strategies to build and strengthen your connection for optimal strengths-based relationships:

• Your partnership should be based on reciprocity. Each of us, school, family, and community, have overlapping responsibilities for the child’s learning.  Each person involved in the partnership needs the help of the others to build a reciprocal relationship that is supported by both formal and informal attitudes and actions.  All parties working together with overlapping responsibilities makes it more likely that the child will thrive.
• Effective partnerships are developed within a democratic process. We must recognize the diversity within our classroom (different races, cultures, interests, and abilities) of participants, and we need to prepare ourselves to resolve conflicts using a respectful and positive approach that includes open conversation and compromise, and sometimes benefits from mediation and negotiation to reach shared goals.
• Opportunities for partnership should be plentiful and varied. A mix of possibilities might include options such:
  • o Having parents come to school to share interests.
  • o Inviting parents come to see what children are doing regularly.
  • o Offering opportunities to volunteer in the classroom.
  • o Providing information and resources for family support.
  • o Creating a “place at the table” for decision making.
  • o Attending parenting education events with topics chosen by the parents.
  • o Finding courses in enhancing communication skills (especially for English Language Learners).
  • o Providing strategies and tools that support children to learn at home and in the community.

Remember, to do these things, you will need to know about your families.  It is important to ask families if and how they want to be involved.  Ask them what a meaningful experience would look like for them and when it might be the best time for them to be involved.

Do not make assumptions about how a family could help you but identify their strengths and offer appropriate opportunities.  For example, just because you need a bulletin board completed does not mean a parent would find the volunteer opportunity of cutting out a border meaningful.  At the same time donning gloves and given cleaning tools to clean an empty room may not be respectful or inclusive to a parent who wants to volunteer in the classroom to spend more time with their own child.  An inventory of actions and activities that families could choose from would be one way to approach the list of what needs to be accomplished.

A robust interview, orientation to the program, questionnaires and surveys about the family will help you to gather information.  Remember that not all families may feel comfortable with reading and writing in English, so be sure to arrange for translators or to relate verbally, based on individual family needs.  Invite families to engage with the program through newsletters, flyers, or an actual invitation from the children in the classroom.  Be creative!  Engage the children in the process as appropriate and remember the cultural considerations your families identify while you are building your partnerships and focus on creating positive, strengths-based relationships.  You will all benefit, but in the end, it is about the benefit for the children.

Building a sense of community goes beyond a simple partnership with families.  In a classroom we are connected by the common interest or purpose of quality education and services for young children.  This is our community of learners.  To enhance the educational experience of the young children we serve, we work to make each child and family feel valued, connected, and that they belong.

Photo 9.4 Preschool girl by Lori Heron on Unsplash is licensed under CC by 1.0

The Importance of Professionalism in ECE as it relates to families:

Image 9.5:  Cover of Unifying Framework for the Early Childhood Profession text (P2P)

As you learned in Chapter 2 about professionalism, you will remember that included in the NAEYC P2P (Power to the Profession) document we are given guidance that in striving to build this profession, we must do so in a way that elevates the knowledge and skills of families and communities.  We as ECE professionals are obligated, professionally and ethically, to develop relationships with all families and the communities we serve, paying particular attention to those from diverse cultures, languages, and experiences which are often marginalized.

To do this, it is essential in our work to create opportunities with families that value their experiences, views and beliefs, and current world views.  When we actively integrate this knowledge of our families in the curriculum and the classroom it ensures that we are more able to respect, learn about, understand, and embrace families’ cultures and communities; and supports us to build stronger partnerships and connections with families and communities with the end goal of supporting all children.

Preschool children often come to school with an understanding of how they are supposed to speak, move, behave, express themselves, and interact with other children and adults that has developed by watching how these things happen in their own homes.  These beliefs about how they are supposed to conduct themselves are largely informed by their families’ cultural backgrounds and ways of being.

It is our knowledge about a culture or a family, shared by the family, that supports us as professionals to use this knowledge to tailor curriculum to the child’s understandings and experiences.

Questions to Ask Families

• What are the cultural norms guiding children’s development? (For example, are the children the center of the home or expected to be more in the background? Do parents do everything for the children or are the children expected to do more for themself?)
•  What are family beliefs and practices for displaying photos of the children and families?
• Do you work with families to create classroom labels, dictations, and signs reflecting the children’s first languages?
• Are you aware of cultural norms regarding touch and personal space?
• Do you discuss cultural differences in a positive, respectful way?
• Are you aware of cultural norms for communication style and person-to-person contact?
• Do you view cultural differences as potential resources or as challenges to overcome?

According to NAEYC (P2P) the guidelines for early childhood educators that relate to our connections with families include:

(a) we should identify and participate as members of the early childhood profession.  We serve as informed advocates for young children, for the families of the children in our care, and for the early childhood profession,

(c) we should demonstrate professional communication skills that effectively support relationships and work young children, families, and colleagues.

Developmentally Appropriate Practice (DAP) and our Work with Families
Image 9.6 Woman on floor with a young boy from childcare.gov is in the public domain.

Developmentally Appropriate Practice is an ECE teaching approach from NAEYC that states “each and every child, birth through age 8, has the right to equitable learning opportunities… that fully support their optimal development and learning across all domains and content areas” (NAEYC, 2020).  In a DAP approach the teacher supports the child’s development (socially, emotionally, physically, and cognitively) based on their knowledge of each child.  This knowledge is used to make appropriate decisions about classroom materials, appropriate interactions and learning experiences that are most likely to be effective and support the development and learning for the group and each individual child.

The DAP Position Statement from NAEYC also guides expectations for our work with families.  DAP Guideline #2 is Engaging in Reciprocal Partnerships with Families and Fostering Community Connections.  This Guideline states:  Developmentally appropriate practice requires deep knowledge about each child, including the context within which each child is living.  Educators acquire much of this knowledge through respectful, reciprocal relationships with children’s families.  Across all ages, families’ expertise about their own children is sought out and valued.

Image 9.7 Childcare provider with father from childcare.gov is in the public domain.

Engaging Families in Meaningful Ways Take another look at the definitions for family involvement and family engagement, and notice how they are the same and how they are different:

• Family involvement is parent participation in educational systems and learning activities that foster a child’s well-being. It involves conscious and intentional attempts to provide information to families and to encourage them to participate in their child’s learning.  This strategy simply involves families in education in some way.  The “unintended consequence” of this approach can be that parents are seen basically as helpers who follow the teacher’s directions.  They are not seen as valuable partners in their child’s education.
• Family engagement is a more holistic and intentional approach in which the responsibility for supporting the child’s learning falls on the parents, siblings, relatives, teachers, friends, and the community; all play a critical function in continuing and reciprocal engagement. Family engagement involves the teacher building relationships with families, learning from the families how they would prefer to be involved in their child’s learning, and working with families to understand and plan how they choose to be engaged.  This would include desired times and methods for sharing information about the child’s experiences.  Family engagement offers a broad variety of approaches and activities that can be offered at home, in the community, or in the classroom or program.

In the pursuit of quality in our work we strive for intentional family engagement.  While doing this work it is important to consider family-sensitive environments.  The concept of family sensitive implies that the teachers, providers, and other early learning professionals will exhibit positive and respectful attitudes towards families.  Knowledge about each individual family, their strengths, the experiences in their lives, and the values and beliefs that influence their decisions, along with responsive practices with families are the foundation for supporting and building positive parent and child outcomes.  Included within this context is a specific focus supporting families by acting as a resource to empower them to promote their child(ren)’s healthy development.  These relationships with families also focus on reciprocal information sharing and empowerment of families by building mutual respect.

Appreciating what families bring to the program is a significant construct of family engagement.  Because families are the experts about their child, each parent/family has specific expertise to contribute.  Parents know how a child interacts with others, how the child responds to new people and situations.  Parents know what a child is interested in and likes to play with.  Parents also know about and can share how a child expresses his or her wants and needs.  Families also bring to the program their individual pride in raising their children along with an understanding of the challenges that are inherent in the job of parenting.  Parents come into a program with their own specific needs for support and information.  An important element of our relationship building process with families is to identify and to build upon the strengths of the individuals involved.  This will demonstrate respect, show appreciation, and value contributions of the family in support of the child.

To engage with families in meaningful ways we must be able to communicate effectively and inclusively.  Inclusive communication refers to an approach aimed at establishing communication using all available means to understand and to be understood.  We need to broaden the options for communication so that we can be sure that the family receives and understands our messages, and that we receive and understand what they want us to know about them or their child.  To be inclusive, we need to be aware of challenges to communication that children or their families face.  There are families who speak languages other than English, and who have hearing, vision, or reading challenges or disabilities.  Some families may not have access to a car to come to school, and some families may not have a computer or internet account to send and receive email.  Effective and inclusive educators also understand that there is diversity in culture and language use as well.  People communicate differently, and a variety of strategies may be needed to help smooth communication.

Some general examples of thoughtful strategies for inclusive communication to use in a classroom are:

• Ask families how they would like to receive information from you- whether it is best to email, call, text, or meet in person.
• Ask what time of day is best and try to connect at that time.
• Be flexible! If one communication method does not work, try another.
• Be patient and allow time to respond or react. Try counting silently to allow for processing, finishing a sentence, or answering your question.
• Engage as many senses as appropriate—hearing, sight, and touch.
• Limit background noise and music.
• Look and speak directly to the child or parent. Face the person and do not cover your face so that they can read the cues on your face or read your lips.
• Make sure only one person is speaking at a time- do not talk over another.
• Speak slowly and clearly with shorter sentences, but do not talk down to the child or parent.
• Use visual supports, gestures, and body language along with words.
• Use interpreters if a family is not comfortable speaking the same language as the teacher. (Do not put a child in the position of translating, but ask for a family member, friend, or community resource to translate the information.)

Photo 9.8 Stick Figure Drawing  by Volodymyr Hryshchenko on Unsplash is CC BY 2.0        `

Equity is the extermination of privilege, oppression, inequalities, and disadvantage through fair and impartial treatment.  Equity is not equal, or one-size-fits-all.  Equity is working with each child and family to individualize and differentiate strengths and areas for growth, to create a plan that gives each what is needed to grow and thrive.  In this intentional and meaningful engagement, equity-based opportunities can also serve to help family members to be effective advocates for their child(ren).  In considering equity in your approach, remember translation, interpretation, work with cultural groups as partners, and recognizing the importance of building (and even rebuilding) trust with families who face discriminations and bias.  For family engagement to be meaningful it must be equitable.

Family-teacher conferences and family events are common strategies for engaging families in classrooms and programs.  We need to remember that the main and essential factor in family engagement is to build strong, positive, and effective relationships with families that can help children and families thrive.  Family-teacher conferences also support the first NAEYC principle of family engagement: “Programs invite families to participate in decision-making and goal setting for their child” (NAEYC, n.d.).  These planned and intentional times to meet are opportunities to share information about the child’s experiences, development, and learning.  It is also the time to plan what can be done at home and at school to support the child’s continuing progress.

Consider these things when planning and preparing for conferences and events:

• Accommodate different languages.
• Discuss different experiences.
• Learn about and consider cultural norms.
• Plan for varied schedules.
• Share different kinds of information.
• Let the family speak.

Overcoming Conflicts

There may be times of conflict between teachers and families.  This can be for many different reasons and the need for resolving conflicts in your work with families may be inevitable.  Regardless of your good intentions and how carefully you plan, conflicts might arise as you and the families you serve work to build relationships and create your communication plans and strategies.  Most commonly, conflicts are the result of a lack of understanding of one (or all) of the following:  background/culture; language; and/or beliefs.  When conflicts arise, we need to remember two general goals:

1. End the disagreement.
2. Preserve the relationship.

Regardless of your goal, good communication will be a key strategy and is the best strategy for a positive outcome.   Following the conflict resolution, it will be important for you, and possibly your team at the program or center to meet and review policies, rules and assumptions that have been in place.  Discuss program expectations for families with your administrator and other staff, be open to assessing what is necessary, what is in place because “it’s how we’ve always done it”, what is a preferred practice or approach, and what is your own personal taste.

When rules and expectations are kept realistic and to a minimum, the opportunity for conflict is also minimized.  This will lead to a more collaborative environment and allow for communication that improves and increases family engagement.  Stay positive and remember that reciprocal relationships are more likely to involve co-creation of a mutually healthy vs. those in which one party tries to set the framework with extensive rules and consequences and expecting the other to go along with their plan.  For example, consider involving your families in developing or updating policies.  It will show families that you respect them and appreciate their presence, as well as conveying a sense of respect and belonging.  This also will most likely encourage more acceptance of the policies and expectations that have been developed together.

When families are struggling- Challenges and Barriers to Connections

Image 9.9 “Mother and daughter standing on cliffs” by Simon Rae on Unsplash is CC by 2.0

We know that there are many benefits that are gained for a family and child when the family is engaged and connected with the teacher and/or the school.  At the same time, we also know that there are barriers to family engagement, and many parents cannot or do not become engaged or connected in their child’s schooling experiences.  These barriers can be on the part of the school or the family.

Some barriers result from limited resources, but can also stem from beliefs, perceptions, and attitudes of families and school staff.  Some common examples stem from lack of teacher time because of other responsibilities and teachers seeing family engagement as just another task to complete.  There are also teachers who do not understand or seek to understand a parent’s communication style or work to build those relationships.  This mismatch may be the result of cultural or language differences; teachers’ misperceptions of the parents’ abilities; limited family resources such as time or lack of transportation; parents’ lack of comfort and not feeling welcome at school.  Some parents may have had negative school experiences that cloud their ability to make positive connections, or they may be unfamiliar with American culture and expectations around family engagement in schools.  There also may be a belief from families that teachers only connect with “bad news”.  This one-way communication system does not allow for opportunities to share information.

From the teacher perspective, some teachers may not feel respected by a parent, or may feel that a family has challenged their authority or questioned decisions.  Mobility in urban areas can also challenge connections due to more frequent movement of the families.  Finally, many families may simply not see the value of being engaged with their child’s education and do not believe they could have any meaningful role in their child’s schooling.

Each one of these barriers can be mediated through building an invested interest on both sides, clear and intentional communication, relationship development, and an attitude of partnership.  There are barriers, however, that present a more complicated challenge.  This is by no means a comprehensive list but is offered so that you can begin thinking about building a collection of resources or a resource file that you can offer to families when barriers are identified and/or disclosed.  It is important to learn about safety and structure for children and families and how to offer non-judgmental support.

Challenges to making connections with families who are experiences distinctive situations might include:

• Dysregulated children and/or dysregulated adults: dysregulation refers to a poor ability to manage emotional responses or to keep them within a socially acceptable range of typical emotional reactions.  This can include sadness, anger, irritability, and frustration.  We know that a parent who has emotional dysregulation will also most likely struggle to teach their child how to regulate.  Dysregulation can also be the result of early childhood trauma, child neglect, or traumatic brain injury.  A person might also be biologically susceptible to react emotionally, which can be triggered by ongoing, but low levels of negativity or invalidation in their life circumstances.

• Families who are impacted by domestic violence, substance use disorder, mental health challenges, and other difficulties. Recent statistics show that up to 12% of children under 5 years old live with at least one parent with an alcohol or substance use disorder (SAMHSA NSDUH, 2009–14).  When a parent has a substance use disorder, it can have negative effects on their children and on overall family functioning.  Children who live with a parent with a substance use disorder are at increased risk of experiencing other challenges, such as mental illness, poverty, domestic violence, academic problems, abuse, and neglect.

Remember that in early learning and education, your role clearly states your responsibility as a mandated reporter.  This means that you are legally obligated to report suspected child abuse or neglect to the appropriate state child protection agency.  You are required to report incidents where there is a reasonable suspicion that abuse or neglect has occurred or there is a substantial risk that abuse or neglect may occur, but must not, investigate on your own.

You should include in your orientation process a clear and detailed conversation about this mandate.  You want to create a culture of safety where you operate with shared attitudes, values, goals, and practices with the intent of zero harm to children.  It is important that you review your goal of partnership and working together in family engagement and communicate to families that you are not “out to get them”.

• Tough decisions about inclusion in the program: Inclusion can be defined as children with and without disabilities learning alongside each other, integrated into the same classrooms and all receiving an appropriate, high quality education.  The Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) mandates that students with disabilities be educated in the least restrictive environment – to the maximum extent appropriate.  There are many benefits to inclusion such as resources to support individualized and differentiated learning, teachers having the support of other teachers and specialists, children learning with other children their age, and children learning to accept and value differences.

To be successful with inclusion, the decision needs to be made case-by-case.  All children have different needs and there is always a variety of different ways to meet those needs.

Consider the following in working with the family to make the inclusion decision:

• o Is your learning environment structured for inclusion?
• o Can the child learn and make progress in a group setting?
• o Can the teacher provide appropriate instruction so that all children can understand and be engaged?
• o Can the child tolerate an inclusive classroom without being over stimulated or overwhelmed?
• o Does the list of pros outweigh the list of cons for the child’s best benefit?

Image 9.10 child with giant bubbles by Alexander Dummer from Pexels is licensed under CC by 1.0

Community Resources for Families

We have mentioned that families need community support.  There are many ways that that communities can support families and their local school districts.  Many school districts form committees to reach out to local businesses for support.  For some this might look like donations for school events, but it can also be in other ways.  For example, if there is a school district that has the children of a large factory or business in their catchment area and few parents are coming to the school to volunteer or to attend events and conferences, the school might work with the factory on how to make it possible for parents to be at the schools more often without fear of losing their jobs.

Some factories could close one day for conferences, allow paid time off, or allow parents release time from work for when they want or need to be at school events.  There have also been businesses that have events like a “Lunch and Learn” in which the business brings in a qualified community member to talk about how to prepare your child for kindergarten, how to engage in enrichment activities on the weekends, how to find quality childcare in the area, etc.

Community Supports for Families Communities can also help families by providing new crosswalks with traffic lights on busy streets for families who need to walk to school or maybe organizing walking school bus groups in neighborhoods for those who live too close for bus service.  There are also public health departments that can arrange for vaccine days or dental health check days in schools.  Social Service workers can be available to help families who many need to apply for nutrition assistance or state medical insurance or help in paying utility bills, etc.  When families, communities, businesses, and schools work together; children are benefit and the community thrives.  The possibilities are endless when there is a willingness for community entities to communicate and brainstorm ways to support children and families.    As part of your ongoing work with families, building partnerships, and engaging them in their child’s education, you may become aware of resources that the family could benefit from.  What are the resources available in your community or beyond that you could share contact information about with families?

Consider these broad categories, and use the template in Appendix 9.1 to build a resource list for your reference:

1. a) Basic family needs such as food, shelter, and clothing. Where are your community food and/or clothing banks?  Where could you refer a family for housing support?
2. b) Cultural and language supports for families. Many children in our classrooms represent multiple languages and multiple cultures.  Who in your community can you turn to for information and support?  Are there interpreters and translators available?  Is there a community organization that focuses on specific and individual cultures for supports?
3. c) Developmental supports and referrals. Teachers monitor child developmental as part of an ongoing curriculum and assessment cycle.  When you identify possible concerns, or a parent shares concerns with you, where can you refer for assessment?
4. d) Resources for medical issues. Families sometimes do not know where to access medical help or insurance.  What are the health care services and supports available nearby?

Final Thoughts:  The benefits of connection

A positive relationship with families, along with a program that is committed to family engagement is vital to a child’s success in school and life.  This includes parents, teachers, schools, and the community, and is uniquely important in the earliest years of a child’s education.  We know that children need support and guidance as they are developing skills across all domains: motor, social, emotional, physical, and cognitive both at home and school.  We also know that it is also important for educators to build relationships with families and help parents understand how they can support the learning that is happening in the classroom in their home.

Parent engagement and positive relationships between home and school support improvement in children’s health; well-being; and cognitive, academic, and social skills.  There is also a positive influence that works to decrease challenging behaviors in children.  Family engagement has also been shown to increase parent satisfaction with early childhood services.

We have all heard the saying that it takes a village to raise a child—and the continued support of that village to help the child succeed in school.  Family-school-community partnerships promote family and community involvement in children’s schooling.  When early care and education programs encourage parental participation in learning activities, provide opportunities to advocate and guide policies and form partnerships with local organizations, children, families, programs, and communities all benefit.

A shared understanding and commitment between families and educators will create the conditions where a love of learning can develop in our youngest students.

When families and community members are involved in student learning, students improve their skills in all areas, and gain advocates that promote their success, helping them feel more confident at school and in life.

Chapter Attribution

“Chapter 9:  Family Connection” authored by Ardene Niemer is CC-BY 4.0

Resources

Evans, Rian Alvin. (2018). Making Connections.  The Professional Obligation to Value Families.  Young Children September Issue.  Vol. 73, No. 4

González, N., Moll, L., & Amanti, C. (Eds). (2005). Funds of knowledge: Theorizing practices in households.

McCance-Katz, Elinore F. National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH). Health CBHSQ Data (https://www.samhsa.gov).

Moll, Luis C. (2005). Funds of Knowledge:  Theorizing Practices in Homes, Communities, and Classrooms.  Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, Inc.

NAEYC. 2020. Developmentally Appropriate Practices Position Statement.  https://www.naeyc.org/sites/default/files/globally-shared/downloads/PDFs/resources/position-statements/dap-statement_0.pdf

NAEYC. n.d.  Principles of Effective Family Engagement.  Washington, DC: NAEYC.  https://www.naeyc.org/resources/topics/family-engagement/principles

United States Government Accountability Office. (2019). Performance report: Fiscal year 2019. https://www.gao.gov/assets/710/702715.pdf. CC BY NC 4.0

Vanderbilt University.  https://iris.peabody.vanderbilt.edu/module/div/cresource/q2/p05/

Websites to explore for further information and learning:

National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC) www.naeyc.org

Developmentally Appropriate Practices (DAP) www.naeyc.org

Parent to Parent (P2P) www.p2pusa.org

Early Childhood Learning and Knowledge Center (ECLKC) https://eclkc.ohs.acf.hhs.gov

Parent Engagement in Schools www.cdc.gov

Family and Community Engagement www.ed.gov

The 8 P’s of Parent Engagement https://www.nea.org

Appendix 9.1

The following chart is offered as an example of an assignment or an opportunity for student reflection. Gather resources from the local community that might enhance work with families and support the needs of families as discussed in Chapter 9.  Add and delete resources as appropriate to your own community, families, and individual need.

The chart below was adapted from work by Linda Segur at Olympic College.